Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Salida

I wish I could tell you what chemotherapy cycle I will be starting tomorrow, but I seem to have lost count.  Be that as it may, tomorrow is a special treatment for me and it marks the end of part of my journey.  Tomorrow will be the last time I go to Grandview Hospital for chemotherapy and it is bittersweet and in some regards scary at the same time. 

GVH participates in this patient satisfaction surveys which are run by this company Press Ganey.  I never used to pay attention to the survey when it would come in the mail before I got sick because I felt like no one read them, when in reality I knew how the hospital valued the patient feedback from them because my mother was the nurse manager at Southview for 10 years. 

Its no secret the sense of appreciation I have for the people involved directly and indirectly with my care runs, for lack of a better word, deep.  As such, the least I could do was to fill out the Press Ganey and return it to show the hospital management the staff was doing more than required of them.  

As time has progressed though, the Press Ganey's seem so insignificant with the volume of care I have received and I don't mean just physical care either.  I would be remiss to not mention a majority of my caregivers know my mother in some capacity or have gotten to know me from my repeated and lengthy visits.  Regardless of that, the kindness and compassion I have been shown is second to none. 

I can remember the second time I was admitted to GVH for a lengthy period of time, I was bouncing around the 4th floor - MACU, MICU, SICU the whole lot.  Anyway, the first night I was on 4 I remember being in my room and starting to doze off (while watching a rerun of MASH because I'm cool) and I slept for an hour or so and woke up.  Courtesy of all the drugs I was on, I had no idea where I was and I just started crying uncontrollably and writhing around in my bed because I was so scared.   My nurse came in, who I knew previously, but didn't recognize at all and she sat with me and calmed me down all while holding my hand until I caught my breath.   She stayed with me that night while I slept because I woke up several times and she was there to calm me before I 'erupted' again.  

For the next five nights, I was so petrified to go to sleep because I knew I would wake up and be frightened so this nurse and one other with whom she had spoken to, would sit with me for a majority of the night just in case I were to wake up. 

That kind of care doesn't just happen everyday. 

But it is par for the course at Grandview and Southview.  Those two hospitals are full of angels.  The selflessness exuded by the staff goes so far beyond a Press Ganey. 

The nurses who cared for me might not remember me and that is okay, because I remember them - maybe not all by name, but I remember their actions and they won't soon be forgotten.  

I've often said, of Dr. Nanda specifically but also includes the hospital staff, I don't know what the feeling of saving someone's life is like.  I don't know what the feeling of saving that person's life multiple times is like.  But, I do know what it feels like to have been saved in every way you can be and it was and has continued to be a life changing event.  Like the song from Wicked says:

                "...because I knew you, I have been changed for good..."

And it is, without a doubt, the truth.  So tomorrow when I finish my chemotherapy I leave knowing I have received the best care I could have ever received, and without the people inside the building at 405 W. Grand Ave, I wouldn't be here today.   As I transition to the main office at Kettering Hospital, I'll be reunited with Kim, my former chemotherapy nurse who moved to KMC a few months ago - so I know I'll be in good hands.  But just like the first day of grade school, high school or even college - I know I'll have a little apprehension because its foreign.  And even though Kim will be there to greet me as well as Dr. Nanda - It'll be hard for me to replace the great people at GVH with the people at KMC.

So lets fire up that needle one more time!!!


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